Art About Difference

Art is a way to express feelings. While drawing I am happy, often angry, sometimes endlessly sad or even destroyed. Sometimes I feel all of these emotions all at the same time.


My paintings are an entrance. I want the viewer to become a part of the world of a person whose life is influenced by autism.

That brings me straight to a word "autism." If you look at my pictures, then you may make assumption that I am autistic myself. In fact, it is my son who has this particularity. When he was only a few months old, I realized from his rhythmic movements and twitching that something was different about him. I told my husband about it and we watched him for a while. The symptoms were worse on some days and better on others. Over time, however, unbridled tantrums, screaming attacks, and self-injuring behaviors overwhelmed us. Sometimes our son hit his head so hard against the floors and walls that he was green and blue. At night he had screaming attacks and roared so loudly that our neighbors complained to us and knocked against the walls.

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Image Description: One of Desi's paintings, which features a number of children's faces, making various subtle facial expressions.

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At first I was angry and sad, because I knew there was no cure.  I was desperate and completely at the end of my rope. Then I took notes and began to paint and sculpt together with my son. We changed our life in small steps and art as well as reading became an important part of this change. My husband and I practiced accepting him as he is, with all his edges.  Our painting together spurred me to cope with all my emotions. My son can not bear it when I cry, scream or laugh loudly. So art is the best way to explore all the feelings I have.

 

My husband and I practiced accepting our son as he is, with all his edges.

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Image Description: A mixed-media piece by Desi, which features four children's faces. One of the child's heads is filled with scraps of paper which look like theyare ripped from a diary.

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An "autist" does not differ externally from a "normal" person. He stands out only because of his behavior. In the past, I was easily annoyed by the looks of other parents, when they observed my son's symptomatic behavior. Today I am more relaxed. This is exactly what I try to show in my pictures. I don't shy away from showing the pain and the anger that I sometimes feel when my child is violently spinning and can not be calmed down. I practice with him every day and we do rituals that give him security. Sometimes I struggle to cope with this pressure. My paintings help me. I publish my works on the internet to reach people all over the world who may be affected by similar issues or in a similar situation. My paintings are also for those who have never before had experience with an autistic person. I'm convinced that you will find yourself in my art.

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Image Description: A drawing of Desi's, which features images of the same child who features in many of her artworks.

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Medical research learns more about autism every day. Therapies are an important step, but above all I've found that the cohesion of the family is what helps the most. Without my husband, I might have failed in the experience of raising a child with autism. Without my painting, I would have died emotionally.

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Image Description: Self-portrait by Desi, which features a picture of her with scratch marks super-imposed upon on. This piece is about the self-injurious behaviors which Desi often witnesses her son perform.

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I think it's important to find a balance. Many parents of autistic children forget about themselves and spend all their time worrying about their children. For them I hope that, despite all the challenges, they can remember to take care of themselves too. Most of all, I hope that others remember that they are not alone.

You can contact or follow Desi's work at @eerised_art.

Epilepsy Is A Part Of Me

As a child, I was told that I was prone to seizures, but I never thought I would experience them as part of my day to day life.  Everything changed, however, the first day of orientation during my freshman year at Wheaton College. 

 I spent the day like everyone else - moving into my dorm room, unpacking, saying goodbye to my mom and saying hello to the next chapter of my college life.  

And then it happened.  I was out with some new friends, eating pizza, when a piece got stuck in my throat.  Seconds later, my right arm lost sensation.  I started to lose consciousness.  I screamed for help.  I thought I was dying. 

 I was told my seizure lasted for a few minutes; I fell out of my chair and my body shook uncontrollably on the floor.  EMS came immediately and rushed me to the hospital.  

From that moment on, my life shifted. Suddenly it revolved around regular visits to doctors and  hospitals, as well as frequent testing (MRIs and EEGs). I also had to try out different seizure medications to find the one that was the best fit for me.

 In my college years, if anyone mentioned the word “epilepsy” or the word “seizure” I couldn’t tolerate it.  I worried about my future.  Would I graduate college?  Would I get a job?  Would I have friends? 

Around this point in my journey, I met Dr. Devinsky from Finding A Cure for Epilepsy and Seizures (FACES).  I have vivid memories of how I felt during my first appointment.  I don’t remember much of what he said when we first met, but I definitely remember that I was crying hysterically. Dr. Devinsky has played an important role in my journey. Over time, he found a medication to adequately control my seizures.  I am grateful beyond words.

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Image Description: A woman looking up at the camera contemplatively.

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 I have been seizure free for six years. This was a critical step forward in my journey, and it presented me with the next important transition in my life with epilepsy.I needed to decide how I wanted to live.  Was I going to live live with fear and or live with courage? Was I going to tolerate the fear of never following my dreams? Could I live with my  fear that my life would be crushed by my condition? Or, would I find  the courage to persevere? Would I find the courage to push forward?

I chose to live with courage.

I refer to this choice as “my acceptance.”  For me, it’s about finding a way to cope and live with the condition - for what it is - while living my life as fully as possible.  

Acceptance and life experience led to four big shifts in my outlook, and my life: 

BEFORE, I thought: People would not accept me because of my epilepsy; I worried they would doubt my abilities because of my condition. NOW, I can see that people recognize how capable I am - based on my performance, rather than my epilepsy. 

BEFORE: I could not tolerate epilepsy.NOW, I am comfortable with my epilepsy, and I can talk about it openly.

BEFORE, I thought:  I could never drive or socialize freely.NOW, I have my license and drive myself to and from social events with friends. 

BEFORE, I thought: I was at the mercy of my disorder, loaded with anxiety and fear. NOW, I am on the right medication and have educated myself about my condition. My choices make me a healthy and functioning person. 

I’ve come a long way…

As a girl, I didn’t understand the word.  

As a young adult, I couldn't handle hearing the word.

Now, as a woman, I can talk about my condition and say: epilepsy is a part of me.

How The ADA Helped Me

My name is Jane and I was born in Chicago. Soon after my birth, doctors realized I had cerebral palsy.  My CP resulted in physical and cognitive deficits. I have right arm weakness which prohibits me from doing two-handed tasks. My attention deficits, slower processing speed, and problem-solving skills affect my academic and vocational performance if accommodations are not granted. 

For these reasons, the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA) has played a crucial role in my education. Because of the ADA, I was able to graduate from high school, college, and graduate school. Having my CP-related deficits did not make excelling easy. I had to work twice as hard as the typical student without a learning disability and I had to be pretty resourceful to get around my one-handedness in school and graduate training.  

The ADA insured that reasonable accommodations would be made during my entire schooling. As I write, you will see what is meant by “reasonable accommodations.” For me, it began when I began experiencing academic difficulties in fourth grade. After receiving a neuropsychological evaluation that revealed my deficits, I started receiving accommodations. The accommodations included receiving extended time on exams and projects, getting the help of a peer note-taker, and getting access to class material prior to the start of each semester. I needed extended time because my processing of information was slow, a peer note-taker because I was a slow writer, and access to class material would allow me to study in the summer so I would not lag behind the class because of my slow reading.  The accommodations leveled the playing field for me so that I could demonstrate my intelligence and not be hindered by slow processing and reading.  

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Image Description: A group of friends watch as one young man, who utilizes a wheelchair, shares an image on his phone with them.

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As I continued my education, my accommodations changed as the program demands changed.  When I entered graduate school to get my masters in Psychology, I needed accommodations that would serve me both in class and in clinic practicums. In class, I continued to receive extended time for exams and a peer note-taker. For clinic practicums, I now required audio recording privileges to take home after therapy sessions. Students in my program were generally not permitted to take home audio recordings of their patient sessions.  The Office of Students with Disabilities (which is responsible for ADA implementation in my program) arranged for special permission for me to take home the recordings of my patients so I could fill in the gaps of my therapy notes that occurred because of my slower processing speed and working memory deficits. Physically, I had to learn compensatory strategies to manipulate testing materials. An occupational therapist taught me ways to maneuver materials using one hand. She taught me to use therapy “sticky mats” to keep things in place and ways to grab materials in a seamless manner during sessions with clients. The occupational therapist also suggested using a suitcase with wheels to carry all my books and materials to the clinic. Again, the faculty recognized by unusual changes in procedures as “reasonable accommodations” since they were protections offered by the ADA. 

The ADA applies to all individuals with disabilities in all levels of education and employment. According to the United States Department of Justice Civil Rights Division on the ADA:

“This law is one of America's most comprehensive pieces of civil rights legislation that prohibits discrimination and guarantees that people with disabilities have the same opportunities as everyone else to participate in the mainstream of American life -- to enjoy employment opportunities, to purchase goods and services, and to participate in State and local government programs and services. Modeled after the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which prohibits discrimination on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, or national origin – and Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973 -- the ADA is an ‘equal opportunity’ law for people with disabilities.”

The faculty members in my program were unaware of how the ADA applied to students in graduate school. Most assumed that the ADA only applies to students in secondary undergraduate programs. Their incorrect understanding of the law and reluctance to understand my eligibility for accommodations in graduate school prompted me to seek the advice of legal council. With the help of an attorney advocating for my rights, the faculty began to comply and grant my accommodations. The main reason colleges have a center for students with disabilities is because of the ADA for students. Unfortunately, in my case, my school’s Center for Students with Disabilities was unable to be helpful. Thankfully, the law is there to protect people in my position. 

I am now working at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. I continue to use the same accommodations that I used in graduate school in my work today.

Everyone Deserves A Prom

Going to the prom is often a rite of passage for teenagers, and yet many young people with differences don't get to go to prom because their schools or support programs don't sponsor prom events. That's where the Tim Tebow Foundation comes in. Every year the Foundation hosts "Night to Shine" events all over the country and world, where people over the age of 14 with differences can come to get their hair and make up done, get their shoes shined, ride in a limo, dance the night away, and be crowned King or Queen of the Prom. It's a very special program and this year it takes place on February 7th.

You can check out highlights from last year's event in the video below, and we'll be updating this post as we get highlights from this year's event in the coming days. Given the popularity of last year's events, which drew 100,000 people, this year's events are likely to draw 115,000 guests with disabilities and 215,000 volunteers.

Looking to find an event near you? Check out this year's event locations here.

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